Never Trust Anyone

A Blog-
Don’t Trust Anyone
Ok, I’ve decided I don’t like people. The lord told us to “LOVE” people. He didn’t say anything about liking everyone. So, I don’t, like them, that is. Well, OK, I like some people. Well, actually I like a lot of people. I just don’t like some of the things they do. Like lying. Some people tell lies, it seems like, just to be telling them, or maybe to impress people, more than likely. I don’t like that, and who are they impressing when most people don’t believe them. Other people lie to cover up for things they’ve done, that they shouldn’t. Those are the worst, because there they’re probably lying, to you, to cover up something they did to you. The other liers are frustrating, when you hear someone you know, telling you, or someone else you know, something that you know is a big fat lie. I just want to say, “why do you tell lies like that.” You like them, mostly, it just the lies and other things they do that bother you. You can’t trust them. How can you trust anyone who lies. If they lie to you, how do you know they don’t steal from you, also. I’ve had the same people that told me lies all the time steal from me. I forgave them, because they were my “FRIEND”, and I thought I needed them. Sometimes I didn’t even tell them that I knew that they stole from me. So, they kept on lying to me, and stealing from me. It hurt me, but I forgave them, because I believed that was what you were suppose to do, and they were my friend or someone close to me, and I didn’t want to lose them. The closer I was to them, the more it would hurt. In some cases I just thought it was the right thing to do to give them another chance. If I had plenty it would be different, but they hurt me financially as well as as emotionally. Once, when a “friend” emptied out my bank account I didn’t have anyplace to stay or any food to eat. But, I forgave her because she was on drugs and wasn’t responsible for what she was doing.
Then finally one day I got wizer, I just stopped trusting or really liking anyone. I decided I was better off alone, without letting anyone get really close to me. I had my cats, they were better than people.
But, lately, there’s been someone in my life who says they’ve changed, and I see that they have given up some of their old habits, and they’ve helped me out a lot, but when I hear them lying to people, even to me. I wonder are they slipping back into old habits or have they ever really changed at all. Then there is someone else who comes into my house, and when I ask them about something, they tell me what I believe to be a lie.
So, I think I’ll just go on, not really trusting or liking, hardly anyone, except The Lord, very much.

By Jenny Kilpatrick
— feeling frustrated. 😦

The Contrite Spirit

I wrote this several years ago. I still agree with most of it.

TheFlowerchild

What does contrite mean?

Caused by or showing sincere remorse.

Filled with a since of Guilt, and a desire for atonement; penitent; A contrite sinner.

That’s what the dictionary says.

Now, lets see what the Bible says.

Ps 34:18 -The Lord is nigh unto them that have broken heart; and saveth such be of a contrite spirit.

In NIV it says- The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Ps 51:17-The sacrifices of God are a broken Spirit; a broken and a contrite heart , O God, thou wilt not despise.

NIV-The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

Is 57:15- For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite…

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More about my crazy life: Where I find myself now

Well, it would seem that I am about the same place as I was April 21, 2011. Though my health seems gradually to be getting worse.  I just saw a post I put on facebook back then asking for help. The only difference is now I am looking for a place to move to as well as looking for help with my car, that has so many things wrong with it that I ‘m afraid to drive it, even when it will start. The only difference is that then I apparently had a little bit of money to give someone to work on it,  though not enough.They only put a bandage on it to keep it going temperedly. I can’t believe it’s ran this long. Well, I have had quite a few problems with it since then. But, Praise the Lord, With his help I’ve managed. What happened is my already HIGH light bill of $220 dollars a month on the budget plan went up to $260 a month. That may not seem like that much to you, but to someone who lives of a very small SS and SSI payment it’s very depressing. I don’t have enough money now to pay my bills here so I was planning to move. Even though I don’t have the money I need for deposits, and other  moving expenses. Originally I wanted to move because I needed to be in  a place closer to Duke Hospital where I was planning to go for treatment. That was over a year ago. I didn’t have the money to even get back and forth to Durham to look for a place. I didn’t want to move in Durham, but out side of Durham somewhere, in the country. I love the country, I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to keep driving with my health the it is, I suppose sometime I’ll have to give up my cats and  move in a nursing home, somewhere, if the Lord doesn’t take me before then, but in the mean time, and for as long as I can, I want to live in the country, and keep my cats with me. I’ve spent to much of my life living in the cities where I was not happy. I have section 8 so if I can find a place within the price range they give me, they will help me with my rent. But, my time ran out, that they gave me to find a place around Durham, and I almost lost my section 8  because of it. So, this year I decide to keep my search local. Looking in the areas that would be convenient to the way I like to drive to Durham, but with my HIGH light bill, I didn’t have the gas to do very much looking, even around here. Then my car broke down, again. Since then  I’ve been stranded, way out here in the country, with my car in town at my sons house. I managed to drive it that far before it completely stopped. So, I set here becoming more and more depressed as the days go by. I’ve no idea what to do. I’ve already missed one doctors appointment. What am I to do? What can I do? Confused smile